leaving not losing.
January 22nd, 2007 | Published in Uncategorized | 8 Comments
With a week left to go in my countdown to London I find myself with a set of conflicting emotions. An overwhelming excitement builds within me as I daydream about my first few moments in London. Will I comprehend where I am? Will I be too tired to care? Or will I run out immediately and begin enjoying the city-life that I have been eagerly anticipating? Probably a mixture of all three. Though I have spent the past year thinking about my stay in London, I know that the minute I am there, none of that will matter. My daily devotion of imagining where I’ll visit, who I’ll meet and even what I’ll wear will dissipate as reality sets in. It will be scary — it will be awesome.
I’ve always loved doing things that push me. I believe that you cannot find the edge of comfort if you do not seek to surpass it. In many ways, this trip is about pushing outward. I’m leaving Elon, a place that I love to be, despite my constant criticism. I’m leaving the comfort of family a half-dozen states away. I’m leaving chances that I would have taken and opportunities that I would have met. I’m leaving a boyfriend with whom I am very much in love. I’m leaving the three jobs which have helped finance this endeavour. I’m leaving a little brother who turns 13 too soon for me to believe. I’m leaving friends who say they’ll keep in touch — but we’ll see. Yes, indeed, I am leaving a lot.
What I do keep telling myself which helps to stifle my fears is this: “Olivia. You are leaving, not losing.” Because really, everything I am leaving will not be lost. Different — probably. But certainly not lost.
January 23rd, 2007 at 3:28 pm (#)
beautiful darling! you must teach me how you made yours so pretty!!and remember, you’re not truly leaving because you take so much with you when you go (literally and figuratively)
)
January 23rd, 2007 at 4:35 pm (#)
Very true!! I have to start packing today, so I’m sure I will soon realize how much stuff truly will make the trip!
January 23rd, 2007 at 5:33 pm (#)
Great start to what will be a very “growing” experience. Hey?! When did you get big enough to go to Europe by yourself??! The last time I took you had to have parental supervision! YIKES Am I THAT old????Love ya, baby!
January 23rd, 2007 at 5:49 pm (#)
Firstly…I am surprised to find that this computer has been logged on as Phoenix14KevSecondly. I am REALLY jealous that you get to go to London. I know very well you will not only be not-losing you will be gaining. You should contact my friend at Oxford. He will give you a great tour and such.-K^2
January 23rd, 2007 at 6:39 pm (#)
Dad — you’re not old. 50 is the new 40!Kevin — That would be awesome. Make sure I get his contact information before I go. Any friend of Kevin is a friend of mine!
January 23rd, 2007 at 7:12 pm (#)
Did you HAVE to post my age??? Jeez:-)
January 23rd, 2007 at 8:04 pm (#)
Awesome blog Olivia! I like the design, especially…Don’t worry, with all the walking around you’ll be doing, I doubt you’ll gain too much. I hope you like Chicken Tikka Masala.
January 23rd, 2007 at 9:14 pm (#)
I love Chicken Tikka Masala. It is only one of my favorite dishes ever. Don’t care much for fish and chips though!